Hello peeps..some were very excited..so I decided to post this…I would really urge d silent readers to comment… More d comments.. More d satisfaction I get…ppl who commented on part 1…thank you so much….! Love u all…hope u will comment on my ffs nd shots ahead also…I really hope so…so tell me now only..r u gonna comment…d silent readers who came up on part 1???? Now enough of my nonsense…here comes..part 2..hope u like it….
I am sitting in my garden thinking about all I did to her. That was too harsh. No that was right, she deserves the pain. Its nothing in front of what she caused to me.
I feel a tap on my shoulder and was going to shout thinking its her but surprisingly, its my dad.
He comes am sits besides me.
” You have not slept yet?” He says.
” Oh I was not feeling sleepy so I came here.” I reply.
” Look Shravan you may have tried to hide it from me but I know that your marriage is nothing for you. You just pretend in front of everyone. I have seen you sleeping separately. I wanted to tell you something on your marriage day only but Suman stopped me.” Dad says and once again I feel my anger surging.
” How dare she? I will talk to her about it.” I say
” No no Shravan you have misunderstood her enough and she let you because she wanted to save me.” He says nearly crying
” Save you from what?” I ask. I don’t understand anything.
” Son, first promise me that you will not hate me after this.” He says , now tears streaming down his cheeks.
” I can never hate you dad. I love you.” I say. Fear engulfs me. What did he do that he thought I would hate him? And what’s suman’s role in all this?
” Actually when she rejected your proposal in college, that was because of me.” He manages to speak between his sobs.
“What?” That’s all that comes out for the hundred questions moving in my mind.
” Yes, I disliked her. I never thought that she could match your status. So I put forward a condition to her. I told her to become your equal, then only I will agree for your marriage. You didn’t listen to her fully and walked away.
You were broken. She became successful and she did that for you. To get you. She knew you hated her but still decided to marry you. I realised my mistake and felt so guilty for thinking that she was not made for you that I told her that I will tell you everything. And all of this hatred will be gone but that selfless girl told me not to tell you ever about it because then you would hate me and she never wanted that. She thought about our relation first and then her own life. I was so confident that you would accept her soon but today one year of your marriage is complete and still your hatred towards her has not lessened. I am so sorry son. I am a very bad dad and I know that. Forgive me if you can. ” he says this and leaves from there.
I sit there in shock. All I feel is numbness.
All my memories with her flash before me. This one year of marriage where I had given her so much pain. Still she didn’t say anything. Just because she didn’t want me to hate my dad?
Tears roll down my cheeks and I feel so much pain. Pain which I have never experienced before. Unbearable pain.
I have to fall down in her feet and ask for forgiveness. Will she ever forgive me?
I rush back towards my room. She had not eaten anything from the morning and I did so much with her.
I enter my room and I get a big shock. She lies on the floor. Blood is coming from her hands and head. Her head must have hit the table when I pushed her. I run towards her as I shout” Suman!”
I sit there with her head in my lap. Blood covers one side of her face. ” Oh my God, what did I do! Suman please get up! Suman please.” My voice croaks and tears fall down my cheeks. I pull her upper body towards me and wrap my arms around her. I don’t want to loose you. I just can’t afford to loose you. I pick her up in my arms and put her on the bed. First I take out all the broken pieces of the bangles stuck to her skin.
” Ahh” I feel the pain as I take out the pieces of bangles which have gone into her skin one by one.
If she even forgives me, I will never be able to forgive myself. I caused her so much pain. So much pain.
Then I tie a band aid around her hand. I move over to clean the wound of her head. As I inch closer to see the deepness if the wound, I feel her warm breaths on my neck. Our faces are just inches away. I come out of my thoughts and see that the wound is not that deep and she must have fainted because of the fast.
Fast. She kept a fast for me after all I did and I ….
I just can’t imagine more. It hurts. It hurts very badly. I put a bandage on her wound.
I take her hand in mine and just feel the warmth of her skin. That warmth, that touch, that contact does some kind of magic to me because I fall asleep with her hand in mine and my head resting near her hand.
When I wake up the next morning, I find that I am covered with a blanket and I am sleeping on the bed. Incidences of last night passes my mind. Then it strikes me, where is she?
And she comes there wearing a white suit with read dupatta, her hair is wet and open and I see that the bandage has been applied to her head and hands both. I take in her familiar fragrance. I jump out of the bed and move towards her.
” Are you feeling okay?” I ask.
“Yeah.” She just says one word and goes to the dressing table to apply vermilion. I come from behind her. We stare at each other for a while in the mirror. Then she proceeds with her work. I take it from her hand and she looks at me with eyes wide. They are asking me that do I want to snatch even this last right of hers?
Without a moment’s hesitation I apply it to her partition while she closes her eyes.
When she opens them, they are flooding with questions.
” Did you have food?” I ask with a softness in my voice which she might have forgotten.
She nods. And I know she is lying, so that I don’t get angry again. Have I caused her so much pain that she is afraid to share things with me? She is not afraid, she just feels that I don’t care.
” I know you didn’t. Wait here, I will bring the breakfast.” I say and go from there without waiting for her reply.
After a while when I bring the breakfast, I see her sitting near the window again. Now I understand why she stares out at the sky. I have not left her an option. I hardly talked to her for four years. And even if I did, I caused nothing but pain to her.
I go and sit beside her. She turns her head to see me. Do I see tears in her eyes? Yes I do. Her eyes are filled and she is trying very hard not to let them fall down. I just can’t see anymore so I just leave from there. Tears stream down from my own eyes. Will this happen every time I look at her? Guilt strikes me and more than guilt, some unbearable pain.
I come home from office at late night. Its raining heavily. When I enter the room, I don’t see her. Fear fills me. Where is she? Is she okay?
I search for her in the whole house but she is nowhere to be seen. I panic.
Without caring about anything, I just storm out of the house frantically searching her in the rain. Then I see her. She is sitting in the garden on a bench. Her arms are wrapped around her knees, her head dug in and she is fully wet. She would have thought nobody would know and nobody would have, had it been the older me.
By now even I am fully wet. My hair coming down to my forehead and water dripping from them. I move towards where she is sitting.
I put my hand on her shoulder and she looks up. Her eyes are red and puffy. She stands up to go but I hold her hand.
” Why did you come here in such a bad weather? You will catch cold.” I say still holding her hand. She does not turn around to face me.
” Do you even care?” She asks and I know that this will answer all her questions. She has the right to ask it. I didn’t care yesterday but its today that changes everything.
” Yes, I do.” I say and she turns around to face me. She didn’t expect that coming.
” Why? ” she asks just a simple question.
I pull her towards me. Her hands are on my chest and she looks up to face me. Our faces are just inches away. I stare down at her to look into those dark eyes.
” Because I love you. ” I say the truth finally. The truth I was running away from the past four years. The truth I was not ready to believe.
I pick her up slightly and press my lips against hers. The feeling makes me feel so good. She kisses back with equal passion and intensity, not withholding anymore. One hand of hers is holding my head from behind and the other is pressed against my cheek. I am hugging her tight and my lips move down to her neck. I move the hair covering that side to the other side. My hands move slowly to her bare back and I press her harder against me. I bury my face in her collarbone, savouring every moment that I spend with her in my arms. She does not resist.
I am still holding her and the rain looks in no mood to stop. Its as if it wants to add its own special touch to our moment.
” I am sorry. Will you ever forgive me?” I ask and that brings tears in her eyes. She does not ask any questions and puts her arms around my neck and says,” I love you too.” And we continue with our perfect moment. My hands still cover her back and I just want the time to stop and witness this moment for perfection with its own eyes. This time she makes the first move and she brings in so much passion that I fear I may loose my balance. I finally put her down but my arms are still around her waist and our bodies are pressed against each other. I move my one hand over her face. I touch her face, look into her eyes and say,” I care, more than you can imagine.”
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- shivlka ff it hurts part 2